I was moved…before I moved.

The truth is, I am a radical at heart, and there’s this thing in me that knows I am just waiting, waiting for…for what? For a leader to follow passionately and boldly? For someone to go first? I look at the church in Acts, and those who followed after You – and it cost them everything. And even if doesn’t cost me my life here – shouldn’t it cost me more than I’m giving? Is it that I’m unwilling? Is it that the time is not right? Is it that I am afraid? Jesus, I pray you show me. How do I give my all? How do I live this life radically for You?
– journal excerpt [January 10, 2009]

Sometimes, when I look back, I can fool myself into thinking that what I left just four weeks ago was exactly the life I wanted. But the truth is, even though there was so much to love back home, the core of me always knew: I was destined for different things. And I don’t mean “bigger” things, because every place and every role has its significance in God’s eyes. I really just mean different things.

God is fulfilling in me now desires, and passions, and joys that I’ve tried so long to satisfy…but all the while, He was simply moving me…before I even knew I was going anywhere.

6 thoughts on “I was moved…before I moved.

  1. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the new blog look!!!! God always has a plan and He always prepares us. Our part is to be sensitive to His call and then in faith obey. Your life and now this incredible adventure give you a powerful testimony. Thank you for sharing it all in this blog. God bless you!! SJ

  2. I'm sure you can relate, because we're similar in personality (or maybe this has nothing to do with that)…but my heart so often yearns for change, for something more and when that change comes I realize how much I miss the stability. However, it's in those unpredictable moments that I find myself truly trusting in God. He never lets me get too comfortable. I believe He's the one who keeps that longing alive and then whispers "find it in Me". He is I AM.

  3. Sara, I CAN relate! I think I have desires for both — for stability and for the more "radical" life of change — often at the same time! (Like right now!) And I suppose there is a season (or many seasons) for each of those desires, as well as all the others. But you are right, the place isn't really what's important — it's finding yourself in Him. He IS my stability AND my radical life of change! Thanks for posting. 🙂

  4. You are such a gifted writer! I feel like I'm reading a devotional. I always tell everyone that asks about you, "Read her blog, it's sooo good. She's such a good writer!" Jody

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